This is just my everyday life. My public journal. It might be a mistake, but I make those all the time so, I’ll just wing it with this category.
Every girl, if I’m not mistaken, wants to feel pretty. Maybe all the time. Maybe just once in a while. Maybe hardly ever. But our appearances matter to us. We want to impress people. We want to look cute, or at least clean. So next time you see a girl in a pretty outfit, look closer. If she’s not smiling, she’s not confident. If she’s not smiling, make her smile.
Do you ever feel like the weight of the world rests on your shoulders, and no matter what decision you make your life will coming crashing down? Well, I get that all the time. Another annoying thing about life is that you can’t explain your own thoughts, just when you need to the most. And one more thing- I sometimes feel like so much stress lingers above me, that at any moment it could collapse, and crush me while doing so. Just think about that.
I rap my knuckles on the red oak door,
and I am greeted with the familiar barking. Then, a wail emerges from one of the babies, I can’t tell which, and there is the thump of someone jumping down the stairs. The door flies open and behind my best friend I see the small, round face of a baby. “Hi, Kiey!” she says. I grin and step through the door.
The other day, a thought occurred to me. Why do I celebrate Christmas? Why do I celebrate Easter? And finally, why do I celebrate Halloween? And I answered myself this: For me, Halloween is a night where family and friends come together and refuse to be afraid. It is a time when nobody is afraid of the dark, because we’re all together, united as one. That is why I celebrate Halloween. What about you?
My feet pound against the ground and I fly over the wobbly steps. I leap into the cold breeze and hit the ground with a thud. The world seems to freeze. I can’t hear a single sound. The voices, the cars, the overhead planes…. seem to have vanished. I crouch in the hay breathing steadily. Soft footsteps come closer. Then, in a childish voice, “I see you.”
Do you ever have someone come up to you and say, “Why are you so sad?” But you know you’ve had a perfectly fine day, and you’re just sitting. So you respond, “I’m not.” But they just wave it off and say, “Yes, you are. I can just tell.” I hate that. People think they know what you’re feeling just by glancing at you. When that happens to me I say to myself, “You can think what you want, but I’m pretty sure I know better than you do.”
I have this bad habit of not paying attention in class. There’s this thing I do that I like to call “Kiley’s Chain”. It’s where I’m thinking about one thing, and that reminds me of another thing. This repeats over and over again, and when I’m finished, I end with the same thing I started with. Having a short-attention span will give you things like this.
At first, I started this website mainly to help others learn how to read and write, and to share my stories. But as it grows, I realize that it has become a way for me to express myself. I love to write and I hope it shows. And to all of you out there who visit regularly, thank you so much for being there. I hope ICannotLiveWithoutBooks.com has inspired you as much as it has inspired me.
Ever have one of those days where you are so exhausted you don’t pay attention at all? You’re so tired that you’ve slumped over on to your desk about 50 times? Yeah, you have, because all of us have. It’s just one of those things that about every human being on the planet has experienced at some point in their lives. Sort of like popping bubble wrap, and jumping up and down from pure delight.
Today was one of those days where I felt vulnerable and sensitive and just flat out tired. Because I was. I hate to say this, but on days like today I don’t care what the heck else is going on in my life. All I know is that I want to get home and collapse in my bed. And as I write this I know that almost every single one of you out there will agree. But if you find the one person who doesn’t, give me a call.
I have a friend who recently got involved in a bad bike accident. She is now in a wheel chair, and may be for the next three months. Today was her third day back at school since the accident. But when we all went outside, her wheelchair hit a crack, and she fell right out. She landed right on her broken leg. Wow. She is an amazingly brave 10 year old.
Also, remember a few posts back how I mentioned the make-your-own bracelets? Well, if I thought this whole thing would blow over… I was wrong. It’s this huge craze. For my birthday, I got a couple of the rubber bands. I never realized how much I enjoy being part of the group until now.