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Bits and Pieces

Why I Stopped Listening to Taylor Swift as a Longtime Fan

I vividly remember the moment I became a Swiftie. I was driving down a back road with my mom late at night, our eyes peeled for deer in the darkness as we belted every word to “Mean.” We started wondering out loud what the song was about, and after a quick Wikipedia search, I eagerly analyzed the lyrics from the passenger seat.

Years later, I was on my way home from the bowling alley in the peak of summer, riding in the back seat of a convertible with my best friend. My thighs stuck to the vinyl seats in the heat as I danced to the beat of “Shake it Off” on the radio. I was shocked when I heard that the artist behind the song of the summer was none other than Taylor Swift. After that, I fell back down the Swiftian rabbit hole, rediscovering the music I had grown up listening to with my mom and doing a deep dive into the years I’d missed. The first concert I ever attended was the 1989 World Tour at Nationals Park in the summer of 2015.

Flash forward five years to when I lay crying into the darkness after listening to folklore at midnight. It was the summer of 2020, when the world and my family were simultaneously falling apart, and despite being so far removed from me and my life, Taylor’s music made me feel so incredibly seen.

Most recently, I remember dancing and sobbing and scream-singing with my best friends at The Eras Tour in 2023, a global phenomenon that still somehow felt so personal, so made for us in that moment in time. We clung to each other as we swayed back and forth to the music, feeling the power of girlhood as it swept across a stadium and believing the lyrics “I was enchanted to meet you” with every fiber of our beings.

In the fall of 2024, I took a college course on Taylor Swift. While I had looked forward to the community the class would bring me and the excuse to talk about my favorite artist for participation points, something unexpected happened that semester. The class taught me to think more critically about a figure I had idolized most of my life. We read thought-provoking articles (like this one and this one) and analyzed Swift’s musical legacy from a variety of theoretical lenses, not all of which reflected favorably on my favorite musician. I learned to take her words and actions with a grain of salt, to think more broadly about the context in which she exists and the consequences of her choices.

Then in fall 2025 Taylor Swift released The Life of Showgirl on October 3, just four days before the anniversary of October 7, 2023—a date that marks the start of the most recent iteration of the ongoing genocide in Palestine. On the album she sings about her friends being canceled and the lavish life she envisions with Travis Kelce in a tone so grotesquely out of touch with reality that I couldn’t bear to listen. Swift had long been silent on issues abroad, and although my passion for speaking up about the genocide grew stronger with each passing day, I excused her time and time again for staying silent. I told myself that the region has a long and complicated history that even I don’t fully understand, and Swift doesn’t ever comment on global politics, and a myriad of other excuses.

…although my passion for speaking up about the genocide grew stronger with each passing day, I excused her time and time again for staying silent.

But then the President of the United States sent ICE into the streets to terrorize American cities. ICE agents murdered people in the streets of Minnesota. A heartbreaking photo of five-year-old Liam Conejo Ramos, detained by ICE while wearing his bunny hat and Spiderman backpack, spread like wildfire online. And while countless other celebrities condemned this violent ripping apart of families, there was once again radio silence from my favorite pop star. In fact, during this time she only occasionally poked her head out of the sand to promote new remixes and music videos.

Swift’s silence on ICE made me realize how quiet she had become not only regarding global humanitarian crises, but on domestic issues. Despite being openly pro-Democrat in the 2018 midterms and the last two presidential elections—thereby overcoming the death grip her country star roots once held on the tenor of her political voice—she has been utterly silent in these crucial last few years for our democracy.

What changed? Well for one thing, she’s married to an NFL player with a largely conservative fan base (I mean he plays for the Kansas City Chiefs for god’s sake). Some have questioned whether Kelce’s presence in Swift’s life has encouraged her to lean into the “tradwife” aesthetic. But I think it is too much of a cop out (and frankly pretty sexist) to reduce the reasoning behind her silence to the influence of her husband. I think this was 100% a Taylor-made choice, and the reason for it is the same reason she spoke out in 2018, 2020, and 2024: Taylor Swift always adjusts. She knows how to respond to what’s going on in the world in the way that best benefits her. When she decided that speaking up had once again become too threatening to the insanely illustrious career she has built for herself, she stopped.

Taylor Swift always adjusts. She knows how to respond to what’s going on in the world in the way that best benefits her.

But honestly? I don’t think that threat is as real as she might think. Some of her contemporaries have made it very clear where they stand on these issues. Gracie Abrams and Maisie Peters both spoke out condemning ICE (and both notably opened for Swift on the Eras Tour). Hozier, The Weeknd, Lorde, and Olivia Rodrigo have all spoken out in support of Palestine, with Rodrigo even contributing a song to the charity album HELP (2). Its proceeds will go exclusively toward helping children in Gaza. None of these artists have had their careers ruined or their fanbases dismantled as a result of their choice to speak up. In fact, in many cases it has earned them more respect and admiration from fans.

This is why in January 2026, I stopped listening to Taylor Swift. Because it got to the point where the art was inextricably connected to my utter disappointment in the artist. I couldn’t listen to a single song without being frustrated and let down by her inability to use her platform to speak up about the ongoing atrocities in the world.

This isn’t to say I’m a moral absolutist—I still hum along when I hear her in the grocery store, and I considered it a good omen when she played in the lobby right before my wisdom tooth surgery (OUCH by the way). But I have made the conscious effort to stop streaming her songs, stop posting about her, stop wearing her merchandise, and stop giving her my money.

I understand that Taylor, like all musicians and celebrities, is human. She’s not always going to get everything right. In fact, odds are she would have messed up even if she had spoken out on the issues I’ve mentioned. But here’s the thing: she could have tried. She could have done something, anything to condemn the horrible crimes that are being committed, both abroad and at home. It’s clear that Swift possesses the power to incite change with her words—voter registrations for young people skyrocketed in 2018 and 2023 after the superstar posted on Instagram encouraging people to vote.

But here’s the thing: she could have tried.

Trying matters. Speaking up matters. Having conversations even though they might be difficult, and even though you might mess something up, matters. This is true in our everyday lives, and it is a standard that I believe we can and must hold celebrated figures to as well.

I still hold out hope that one day Taylor will speak up or make an effort—at least to the point that I can let her music back into my life and my heart. But for now, I’ll continue to devote my time, energy, and money to other artists: artists whose music I can enjoy and feel connected to while simultaneously respecting their courage to say something when it matters most.

Categories
Bits and Pieces

Lucky 7

On October 7, I turned 18 and voted in my first presidential election.

On November 7, the presidential ticket I cast my vote for won.

On December 7, I started my senior year of basketball tryouts and found out I was accepted into my dream college.

Today, on December 14, I reflect on these last few months of lucky 7’s and I am so grateful. After such a long, overwhelming, difficult year, there are some good things happening. And I can hardly stop smiling.

But.

We’re still in the midst of a worldwide pandemic. Black lives still matter and are still in jeopardy. LGBTQ rights are in danger, families are separated at the border, and the climate crisis is exactly that—a crisis. Some days I forget these things, but it is important to remind myself. I am privileged to not face these horrifying realities on a day-to-day basis. That privilege has shaped my quarantine, my year, and my entire life.

I don’t mean to sound pessimistic or bleak. On the contrary, I think my acknowledgment of the terrible things going on in the world proves that I am optimistic about Earth’s future. I have joy now and hope for later. I feel cheerful now and want everyone to feel cheerful later. I am grateful now and ready to fight for a stronger, better later.

A week ago I got into college (phew!). The work isn’t over yet, though. I know I can’t control everything or make the world’s troubles go away, but I can sure as hell try to ease some of its pain. These lucky 7’s are big steps forward on a road where I get to make the world a better place—not by reaching the end, but by doing every little thing right that I can along the way. I hope you’ll join me.

Categories
Bits and Pieces

20

20
My breath catches in a hiccup
19
My head spins
18
My heart is racing
17
Tears stain my face with shame
16
My cheeks glow red
15
The air won’t flow
14
My shoulders tense
13
My eyes are blurry
12
I’m frozen but steady
11
My heartbeat slows
10
My head stops pounding
9
The tears are almost dry
8
I can breathe again
7
I close my eyes and inhale
6
I exhale and squeeze my wrist
5
The world still spins
4
Air fills my lungs
3
I’m okay
2
I’m okay
1
I’m okay

0

Categories
Bits and Pieces

All the Hard Work

All the hard work
I put in
Over the course of the year

All the hard work
Has led to this moment
This terrifying, exhilarating moment

All the hard work
Was worth it
Because I did my very best

All the hard work
Was exhausting
But wonderfully rewarding

Although
To be honest
I feel exactly the same

As I did
Yesterday
And the day before

So thanks for nothing
AP exam
You kinda suck

Categories
Bits and Pieces

Why

Why does it hurt so much 
when I see their posts?
Why does it hurt so much
when I miss every shot?
Why does it hurt so much
when I see the letter B?
Why does it hurt so much 
when I think about all the things I could be?
All the things I’m supposed to be?

Why do I stress about a future so distant?
Why do I cry about problems so small?
Why do I fear change so insignificant?

Why?
Why am I like this?
Why do I care?
I shouldn’t care…

Should I?

Maybe I’m right.
Maybe everyone else should be asking,
“Why not?”

…maybe.

Categories
Bits and Pieces Poems

Thoughts of a Wayward Introvert

You want to be my lifeguard
But I can only breathe underwater
So I keep myself alive
By drowning in my sorrows

You say I look tired
But I’m just lost in thought
You say I look depressed
But like I said before I’m not

You act like I’m strange
Because I do things my own way
But I’m just not as cool as you
And I think that’s okay

You tell me I’m so quiet
And yes sometimes it’s true
But I’m really only quiet
When I have to talk to you

Categories
Bits and Pieces

The Ocean

I belong near the ocean.
My heart yearns for the sound of waves crashing.
My smile appears when I see those beautiful blues.
I belong near the ocean.
And although I believe in science
In facts
And in cold, hard truth
I think in another life
I may have been a mermaid.

Categories
Bits and Pieces

It’s Been a Year

I skipped into the new year
Preparing to shine on the court.
And every victory my team earned
Helped my smile grow.

A mock trial
In a real court room
Allowed my desire to become a lawyer
Blossom even more.

And then in March I resisted.
I wrote post cards,
I spoke up,
I spoke out,
I walked out.
And I walked all the way to DC
Where I marched
Alongside my family,
My peers,
And my country.

I sang with my peers on a glorious stage
In an all state choir.
And in that sea of white and black
My radiant smile shined.

The state of Virginia told me
I was ready to get my learner’s permit
And I drove for the first time,
And for many times after that.

I ran my first color run,
A 5K no less!
(And here’s thanks to the kid
Who got blue powder up my nose
Because I sneezed like a Smurf for days.)

Then I spent a summer
Crossing things off my bucket list,
Learning to bake and cook,
And having lazy pool days,
Among other adventures…

And then sophomore year rolled around
And I cut out some toxic friends,
Played some messy Twister,
And played volleyball and basketball
Because when am I not?

I saw football games
And scary movies.
I turned sixteen
And I painted my toenails for homecoming.
I watched the paint peel off,
And it peeled off slowly.

New York City and Broadway called my name;
So did the court.
I made varsity basketball
And as November came and went
I bonded with my teammates
And my friends.

Incredible travel,
Playing the game I love,
Reigniting old friendships,
Finding courage,
Falling down
And getting back up
And brushing myself off.
Daydreaming,
And creating,
And growing.
This is the year I’ve had.

It’s been a good year
And a long year.
But looking at it all
I’d take nothing back.
Not.
One.
Thing.

Categories
Bits and Pieces

Yesterday

Yesterday
Luck or fate or whatever
Was not on my side

I forgot
To get something signed
I forgot
An item of clothing
A present for my friend
A water bottle
And tennis shoes

I studied all the wrong things
For my chemistry test
I memorized all my choir music
When I didn’t have to
And for the life of me
I could not focus
In AP World History
Which happens to be the hardest class
In schools
Across the entire planet

I didn’t play
In the volleyball game
When one of my best friends decided to come
And as I sat on the bench
Cheering and shouting
I thought,
“Luck or fate or whatever
Is really not on my side today.”

But

Yesterday
My practice was canceled
And I can now go to a club meeting
That I couldn’t before
Yesterday
I found out that I get to be a lawyer
In an upcoming mock trial
When my coach inspected my grades
She saw that my lowest grade right now
Is a 95%.
I discovered that I’m okay with riding the bench
If we win
(Which we did).

I also discovered
That even if
Luck or fate or whatever
Isn’t on your side,
A bad day
Might be rough around the edges,
But it can still be
Good at its core.

Categories
Bits and Pieces

The “reputation” Stadium Tour

Hey there! It seems like it’s been a while since I’ve posted, doesn’t it? It looks like the WordPress app on my phone hasn’t actually been posting the things I’ve been trying to post for the past few weeks. So, be prepared for a stream of new (um… old) posts!

This post is from 1:00 AM this morning, after one of the best nights of my life.

A noisy, sweaty stadium
Awaits eagerly
Talking and laughing and singing
When suddenly
The lights go down
The audience holds its collective breath
No one moves
And then all at once
We all come alive

The music
The lights
It shocks me
And enthralls me
And I can’t look away
It’s so mesmerizing
And loud
And beautiful
And larger than life

And yet
She makes it seem like it’s just her and me
In a room
Talking about life and love and music
It’s not 45,000 people
It’s just her and me

And her smile makes me smile
Her laugh makes me laugh
Because she is my role model
Because she is a performer
Because she is alive and here
In the same space I am
Breathing the same air
And it’s just us

But it isn’t just us
It is 45,000 people
And she’s managed to touch the life
Of every single one of us
And that is a beautiful thing

So as I stand there
Along with the thousands of other fans and friends
I bawl my eyes out
I sing my heart out
And I remember how much music has affected me
How much her music has affected me
And how much fun it is
To scream the words to “Shake it Off”
With 44,999 other human beings